Sobanukirwa n’uko wafasha umukunzi wawe usanze atagira amavangingo

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Kuzana amavangingo ku mugore/umukobwa cyangwa kunyara, bivugwa ko ari kimwe mu bimenyetso bikomeye byerekana ko umugore/umukobwa yanyuzwe mu mibonao mpuzagitsina, bityo bikaba ari ngombwa kumenya impamvu zishobora kuba zamubuza kuyazana,  bityo bikaba byatuma umuntu amenya icyo yakora mu gihe asanze umukunzi we afite iki kibazo.

kuzana amavangingo

Ariko kandi n’ubwo bivugwa ko kuzana amavangingo ari ikimenyetso gikomeye mu kuryoherwa k’umugore, ntibivuze ko abagore/abakobwa bose bagomba kuzana aya mazi ku buryo bungana kuko hari abagira menshi cyane, aringaniye ndetse abandi bakagira make ku buryo hari n’ubwo utabasha kuba wayabona kandi ntibibabuze kwishima.

Hagati aho rero, hari impamvu nyamukuru zashobora kubuza umugore/umukobwa kuzana ayo mavangingo mu gihe cy’imibonano mpuzabitsina, ndetse n’icyo wagerageza gukora kugirango icyo kibazo kibe cyakemurwa.

Kuba umugore ataramenyera kwirekura mu igihe cy’imibonano mpuzabitsina:

Kenshi na kenshi usanga hari abagore/abakobwa baba batarabasha kwerekeza ibitekerezo byabo byose kuri icyo gikorwa, bigatuma mu mutwe wabo hatirekura uko bikwiye ngo ngo bitume aryoherwa ku buryo bunoze bwatuma imyanya ye irekura amavangingo.

Mu byegeranyo byinshi kandi binyuranye byagiye bikorwa n’inzobere mu myororokee byerekana ko abagore bataragira imyaka 30, muri bo abashobora kuzana amavangingo ari bake cyane. Iyo bamaze kurenza iyo myaka, ngo baba batangiye kumenyera no kwirekura ku buryo bworoshye.

Ku myaka 40, n’ubwo umugore aba arimo asatira gucura, ngo nibwo yirekura wese wese ku buryo umubare w’abazana amavangingo uba ari munini cyane. Ushobora rero kwibeshya ukaba warenganya umugore kandi igihe cye cyo kubasha kwirekura akazana amavangingo kitaragera.

Kuba umugore atinya kurekura amavangingo akeka ko yaba agiye kunyarira umugabo we :

Ibi nabyo bibaho, hari abagore bumva ayo mazi agiye kuza, ariko bagatinya kuyarekura bakeka ko bagiye gukora umwanda ku buriri.

Kuba umugore/umukobwa azana make cyane umugabo agakeka ko ntayo azana:

Aya mazi aza atangana ku bagore bose, bikaba bivugwa ko ava ku gitonyanga kugera kuri litiro. Ashobora kuza inshuro imwe cyangwa nyinshi mu gihe cy’umubonano umwe. Igihe umugore azana igitonyanga rero, umugabo ashobora kwibwira ko uwo mugore atajya ayazana kandi imyanya ye irekura make.

Kuba umugore/umukobwa ahangayikishijwe n’uko amavangingo ataribuze:

Uku guhangayika nako gutuma kwirekura binanirana bityo kuzana amazi bikanga.

Kuba umugabo adasobanukiwe n’icyo yakorera umugore we ngo ashobore kuzana amavangingo:

Abagabo benshi bajya bibwira ko ngo kuko bigeze gukorana imibonano mpuzabitsina n’undi mugore runaka akazana amazi, bityo babona uwo bashakanye ntayo azana bagahita bumva ko ubwo we ntayo agira. Hari n’abasore badatinya guhita bangana n’umukobwa bari bakundanye, yamuha bwa mbere ntayazane ubwo bakaba babyaranye abo.

Abagabo bagomba kumenya ko buri mugore yihariye, icyo wakoze kugirango nyirakanaka azane amavangingo gishobora kuba ntaho gihuriye n’icyo wakora cyangwa uzakora kugirango uwo mwashakanye ayazane. Bityo kuba utarabona ayazana bishoboka ko atari ukubera ko atayagira, ahubwo ari wowe utaramumenyera neza ngo usobanukirwe n’icyatuma ayageraho.

Kuba umugabo akora imibonano mpuzabitsina agambiriye gutuma umugore azana amazi :

Ku mugabo, kujya mu mibonano mpuzabitsina ariyo ngamba, bishobora gutuma iyi mibonano ikozwe gutya itaryohera umugore/umukunzi, nta bushake, nta rukundo ndetse n’ubusabane buhagije buba burimo kuko hari intego nyamukuru uba ugambiriye, bityo kubona amavangingo bikagorana cyangwa ntibinagerweho kubera ko umugore/umukobwa aba atisanzuye neza muri icyo gikorwa.

Kuba abashakanye/abakunzi batajya baganira igihe bari muri iki gikorwa :

Kuganira mu gihe muri mu gikorwa cy’imibonano mpuzabitsina ni byiza, kuko umugore aba ashobora kuyobora umugabo aho yamukorera cyangwa amukoreye hakamuryoheraa kugirango ahagume. Iyo ahagumye, ahanini usanga ariho hari butume umugore azana amazi  kuko haba hafite ubwumvumve bukomeye. Ariko kandi iyo atamuvugishije, umugabo akomeza ahinduranya uko yishakiye agirango ibyo ari gukora nibyo byiza, kandi yahava umugore akababara nyamara ntakome !

Imvubura zirekura amavangingo zishobora kuba zidakora neza cyangwa nta n’izo agira bigatuma ataza:

Bishoboka ko umugore ashobora kuba atazana amazi bitewe n’uko imvubura ziyarekura zidakora neza cyangwa bitewe n’ingano y’imisemburo ya kigore yifitemo. Aha rero, icyo abagabo bagomba kwishyiramo, kuko kuryoherwa n’imibonano mpuzabitsina bihera mu mutwe, ni uko kuzana amazi atari byo biyiryoshya, ahubwo kugira ububobere buhagije mu gitsina cy’umugore aribyo by’ingenzi.

Aya mazi rero umugore ashobora kuba ayifitime n’aho yaba atarayazana na rimwe, cyangwa se umubiri we ukaba uteye utyo akaba adashobora kuyazana, nyamara ntibimubuze kuryoshya no kuryoherwa mu mibonano mpuzabitsina igihe agira ububore buhagije kandi umugabo nawe azi icyo gukora.

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