Abagore benshi baryoherwa n’ imibonano mpuzabitsina, ariko usanga uburyo bishima atari bumwe, kuko hari ibintu abagabo bakunze kwirengagiza mu gihe cy’imibonano mpuzabitsina kandi kandi aribyo shingiro ry’ibyishimo ku bagore.

Ibintu abagabo bakunze kwirengagiza kandi aribyo shingiro ry'ibyishimo ku bagore

Niyo mpamvu twahisemo kubagezaho bimwe muriibyo ibintu abagabo bakunze kwirengagiza kandi bituma umugore aryoherwa ndetse bikaba byatuma ahora yishimiye uwo bafatanya mu gukoraicyo gikorwa.

Kugirango umugore aryoherwe n’imibonano mpuzabitsina, ni byiza ko umugabo barimo guhuza urugwiro amweretse ko amwitayeho, kandi akabikora amubwira utugambo twinshi twiza tw’urukundo, kuko abagore benshi bemeza ko badakunda umugabo batera akabariro atavuga cyangwa ngo avuge ibintu bigaragaza ko yishimye, nko kuniha gahoro cyangwa gushishira byo kwishima.

Ikindi kandi abagore bashimishwa n’ uko abagabo babahindurira uburyo babakoreramo imibonano (position), kuko ngo nibwo baryoherwa kurushaho, ariko ngo bakanga urunuka  umugabo ubakoresha uburyo bumwe gusa, kuko bageraho bakananirwa bitewe n’ uko batahinduriwe uburyo, bigatuma rimwe na rimwe binubira kuyikora igihe babisabwe n’ abagabo babo.

Mbere yo gukora imibonano mpuzabitsina, umugabo agomba kubanza gutegura neza umugore, ku buryo agera igihe cyo kuyikora ari uko abona umugore nawe yamaze kwiyumva muri icyo gikorwa. Iyo umugabo abona ntacyo umugore arahindukaho, umugabo agomba kubanza gufata igihe cyo kumuganiriza utugambo twiza kugirango amwibagize ibyaba byamubabaje byose ndetse nibyo yiriwemo, ibyo bigatuma yiyumvamo ko agomba kubikora.

Ni kenshi usanga abagore benshi bavuga ko abagabo babo batabategura bihagije igihe bagiye gutera akabariro, ndetse ngo hakaba n’ abatabigerageza na gato, ngo bitewe n’ uko baba bafite ubushake bwinshi bwo gutera akabariro kurusha abagore babo.

Ni byiza ko umugabo amenya imiterere y’ umugore we, ndetse akanamenya uburyo butamuvuna mu gihe cyo gutera akabariro, bityo akaba aribyo akunda kumukorera kandi akibuka ko agomba gukora ibishoboka byose ngo amushimishe. Igihe umugabo arimo gutera akabariro akananirwa ntagomba kubyereka umugore, kuko bituma ibyiyumvo bishira ububobere bukagabanyuka.

Ni byiza kandi ko umugabo yiga akanahimba udushya twa buri munsi two gukorera umugore we kugirango umugore yishime. Ibi ngo bifasha kugabanya irari umugore ashobora kugirira abandi bagabo, kuko aba yumva ntacyo abo bagabo barusha umugabo we, ibi nabyo bikaba bituma umugore yishima akanishimira umugabo we kurushaho kandi n’ umugabo nawe ntabe yakwifuza kuba yaryamana n’ undi mugore.

Umugabo mwiza kandi wishimira umugore we aba afite inshingano zo guha umugore we impano zimushimisha kugirango umugore we abone ko amwitayeho. Na mbere yo gukora imibonano mpuzabitsina umugabo agomba kubanza kugira icyo aha umugore cyangwa yaba ntacyo afite akagira icyo amusezeranya.

Ibintu abagabo bakunze kwirengagiza tukaba tubisoreje aha, ni byiza rero ko abagabo bubahiriza inshingano zabo, kandi bakereka abagore babo ko ntawundi mu gore ubaruta uko baba bameze kose, bizabashimisha kandi bibafashe kubaka urugo rutamenwa.

TANGA IGITEKEREZO KURI IYI NKURU