Bijya bigora benshi mu bagabo kubaza abagore babo igihe babaciriye inyuma mu rwego rwo kumenya ubuzima bwabo bwite gusa uyu munsi Touchrwanda twabakusanyirije bimwe mu bintu wagenderaho ubaza umugore wawe igihe wamenye ko yaguciye inyuma.

Bimwe mu bibazo wabaza umugore wawe mu gihe wamenye ko yaguciye inyuma?

Akenshi bamwe mu bagabo bajya bumva ko iyo baciwe inyuma n’abagore babo bahita batandukana nabo, gusa siko bimeze kuko umwe mu mpuguke yitwa Dr Lynda wize ibijyanye n’imibanire y’abantu mu ngo zabo avuga ko bitagakwiye gutanya abantu cyane cyane nk’abashakanye.

Akomeza avuga ko biba bigoye kubyakira kuko benshi baba babifata nko gusuzugurwa cyane mu rugo ndetse no kwerekwa ko atazi ibijyanye n’igikorwa cyo mu gitanda, ari nacyo kiba cyatumye umugore we amuca inyuma, aho yaboneyeho gushyira hanze amwe mu mayeri umugabo yagenderaho ashaka gutahura umugore we igihe yamuciriye inyuma mu rwego rwo kumenya ubuzima bwe bwite n’ikibimutera.

Mbere yo gushyira hanze aya mayeri, yaboneyeho kubwira buri mugabo wese uzakoresha ubu buryo ko agomba kubikora ntanda y’umujinya afite, ndetse agasaba umugore kumubwiza ukuri kandi akamwumvisha ko ari ikiganiro bagiye kugirana hagati yabo.

Ibi akaba ari bimwe mu bibazo ugomba kumubaza mu rwego rwo kumenya ukuri kose n’uko mwabyifatamo nyuma:

1. Witeguye kunsubiza ibibazo byose mu kuri utambeshye ?

Ngo mu gihe uzaba ubwiye umugore gutya ngo igihe cyose ashobora kwibwira ko wamaze kumenya neza ibyo yakoze ngo aha ngo nawe azagerageza kubivuga gusa ngo azaba afite ubwoba bwinshi gusa ngo nk’umugabo wamaze kumenya ukuri nukuzajya ubyumva ugatuza gusa ngo ukuri kuba guhari ngo nuko uyu muco atawusubira ukunda.

2. Mubaze ngo ijambo ‘ikibazo ‘bivuze iki kuri wowe.

Ngo iyo umubajije gutya atangira kugira impungenge nyinshi akubaza impamvu uri kumubaza ibyo bibazo bizatuma yiyumvisha ko agomba gusasa inzobe akavuga ukuri kose.

3. Ni akahe gashya wabonye ku muntu mwaryamanye wabuze mu mubano wacu.

Iki kibazo ngo kiba kigoye cyane ku gitsina gore ngo kuko ashobora kugusubiza amagambo abarirwa ku ntoki ngo kuko nawe biba byamucanze ku buryo no kuvuga biba byamurenze ahubwo afite ikimwaro,

4. Byamaze igihe kingana gute byagenze gute?

Aha ngo azahita aguhishurira igihe amaze aguca inyuma n’inshuro bamaze bakundana mu ibanga ngo aha nk’umugabo uhita umenya igihe ikibazo cyatangiriye nicyo ugomba gukora mu maguru mashya.

5. Ese ni ikosa ryanjye kuba waratekereje kunca inyuma ?

Hano n’ubwo atari ikosa ryawe, bizatuma umenya ko yemera icyaha kandi akacyicuza cyangwa se niba ashakisha kugira uwo yagerekaho icyaha akihunza ibyamuteye gukora ibyo yakoze.

6. Ubabajwe n’uko wanciye inyuma cyangwa gufatirwa mu cyuho?

Aha ngo umubajije gutya ashobora kwisubiramo byinshi mu makosa ye, aho ngo azatangira kuvuga byinshi biterekeranye gusa ngo ukuri kwabyo nuko azaba yarabikoze kandi nawe ukamenya aho wahera umenya niba koko yicuza.

7. Ushobora kwemera gusezera burundu ku muntu mwakoranaga ibibi ndets n’ibindi byabahuzaga?

Aha ngo azahita yiyumvisha ko ntakabuza urimo kumwereka ko ibyo arimo atari byiza uri kumugira inama yo kubivamo, ndetse ngo azahita yumva ko ibyo bakoraga byose byari ubusa busa ngo azahita yumva inzira nyayo  ikwiye .

8. Wifuza ko nkubabarira?

Mu gihe wamenye ko yaguciye inyuma, aha ngo acyumva iki kifuzo cyawe azahita yumva ko wamaze kumenya ibye byose kandi byakubabaje, ngo azahita amenya ko kubabarirwa aribyo byonyine byatuma mukomezanya umubano, azhita asaba imbabazi ku makosa ye yose.

9. Mubaze ati niki wifuza ko nagukorera mu rwego rwo kugirango ngumane nawe ubuziraherezo.

Ngo iri jambo narita mu gutwi azakubwir buri kimwe cyose cyamuteraga kuguca inyuma bityo ngo nawe nk’umugabo uzahita umenya icyo gukora bitewe n’imbogamizi yakubwiye zajyaga zituma ajya kuguc inyuma mu bandi bagabo bo kuruhande.

Ngo ibi byose bizasozwa n’ikiganiro uzamuha ku byaha wamumenyeho ndetse aha niho muzahita mufatira umwanzuro ndakuka wicyo kibazo, gusa ngo ibi bizaba byiza ko biguma hagati yanyu.

Impamvu yibi ngo nuko wa mugabo bajyaga bakorana amabi uramutse haricyo ubimubwiyeho ngo bishobora kuba nabi, ahubwo ngo bisaba ko niba mwari inshuti mukomeze musangire gusa umugore akaba ariwe wima umwanya wawundi bajyaga bishimana mu ibanga, ngo bizatuma wa mugabo nawe acika intege ahite abivamo burundu.

TANGA IGITEKEREZO KURI IYI NKURU